Suffocation
by Craig Sterling
Summary: Binky Barnes seems to be a typical teenager going through some growing pains. But appearances can be deceiving. With a growing darkness inside of him, Binky will wander down a path of destruction - one that could damage both himself and those around him. Rated T: mature thematic material, language, drug/alcohol use and some violence.
1. Chapter 1: Another Piece Taken Away

Chapter 1:

Binky Barnes stared at the graded test in his hands. Another F. Red marks were everywhere around his answers. Even the partial credit was not enough to redeem the academic carnage. He put the test down and leaned back in his chair. The grade was not necessarily a surprise because school was never Binky's strongest suit. The only problem was his grades were getting even worse. For most of his student life, there were lots of D's. Now, he was consistently getting failing marks. Flunking high school seemed inevitable, which lead Binky down a continued path of mediocrity.

In more ways than one, Binky had given valiant attempts to restore some academic credibility. He tried to sit in the front row of classes, got tutored by professionals and fellow students, and even went to therapy sessions with an education psychologist. Nothing seemed to improve his performance in school. It was like trying to break through an impenetrable wall.

The worse part was all his friends were doing better than him. None of them had academic issues like he did. Arthur and Francine got A's and B's. Muffy and Buster got B's and C's. Brain, of course, got straight A's without even flinching. The only classmate who struggled like Binky was George. George had an excuse though: he had some learning disabilities. Binky was tested back in junior high for learning disabilities, but the tests confirmed he had none whatsoever. As far as he could surmise, he was just stupid, plain and simple. The thought of being mentally incompetent made Binky terribly angry with himself. How come he couldn't do well in school? Did the doctors miss a brain tumor or something that was affecting his intellectual capabilities?

RRRRIIIIIINNNNGGGGG

That was the bell, meaning school was done for the day. Binky threw his test into his backpack and headed out of the classroom. He walked fast to his locker and didn't make eye contact with anybody. This had turned into a normal occurrence: just lower your head and no one will bother you. As he dialed the combination on his lock, he felt a wave of rage swell inside of him. Binky wasn't sure if it was the test he just bombed, or the fact that he was a pathetic retard. He clinched his fist till the skin on his hand turned bright pink. BAM! Binky punched the locker with all the strength he could muster. He instantly felt an avalanche of pain shoot from his fist up through his arm. He looked down at his knuckles. They were all bruised and bloodied. Binky imagined that somehow his puny brain looked the same way.

"Binky, you okay?"

Binky half looked over his shoulder. It was Sue Ellen. She had a concerned look on her face. "I'm fine," muttered Binky, trying to avoid a conversation with the girl. He started to put some books into his bag.

"Did something happen to you? I just saw you punch your locker," said Sue Ellen. Binky closed his locker and tossed his backpack over his shoulders. "None of your business," he replied angrily, then headed out of the building. Sue Ellen stood there watching him walk away and wondering what on earth was going on.

Binky got on his bike and rode home. It was actually a nice day, with a bright sun shining down from the clear, blue sky. Binky hardly noticed though, as he was determined to get back to his house and be alone. As he pulled into the driveway, he noticed his mom's car was parked there. She must have gotten off of work early. Or, she didn't work at all today. Binky rarely asked his mom what plans she had for the day, as he tried to avoid talking to her at all costs.

As he opened the front door, he heard noises in the kitchen. He walked into the room and began shaking his head at what he saw. His mom was sitting at the table and crying into her hands. Mrs. Barnes heard her son come in and looked up at him. Her eyes were red and puffy, and tears were rolling down them. She forced a weak smile. "Hello, dear. How was school?" Binky threw his backpack on the ground.

"You gotta stop crying, mom. This is stupid," he said with his arms crossed. Mrs. Barnes kept looking at her son. "It's how I deal with it, Binky," she replied quietly. Binky clinched his non-injured fist. "Crying doesn't solve anything! It won't bring him back."

Mrs. Barnes pulled out a handkerchief and wiped the tears from her eyes. "I know, dear," she said. "So knock it off!" half-yelled Binky. Mrs. Barnes stood up with a red face. "Don't tell your mother what to do!" she said sternly.

"I've moved on with my life and you just can't get over it!" Grumbled Binky. The two stood there in silence for a moment. The antique clock in the living room was ticking away and was the only sound that could be heard. Binky glared at his mom. He couldn't believe how childish she was acting. Crying like a five year-old? What a pathetic way of coping. Mrs. Barnes timidly walked up to her son and tried to hug him. Binky pushed her away and started heading for his room.

"You can't keep pushing me away, Binky! You're not like your father!" screamed Mrs. Barnes. Binky whipped around. "Once I'm 18, I'm gone, okay?! It's your fault dad is gone! You messed this family up!" Yelled Binky. Mrs. Barnes slammed her fists on the table. More tears were pouring down her face. "I was wrong. Both you and your dad are the same! You're both monsters!" she bellowed. Binky spat at his mom, which made her step back. "Go to hell, you bitch!" he roared. He then stormed off to his room.

Binky slammed the door shut, and sat on his bed. He now knew where he got his dumb brain from – his own mother. He placed his hand into his hands and began messaging his temples. He could feel his blood boiling. Stupid, weak mom…crying, as if that's going to change anything.

Binky pulled a knife out of his pocket and exposed the blade. He rolled up his sleeve, and began to slice his wrist. The burning sting and sight of blood gave him a moment of peace. If he couldn't control his miserable life, at least he could control his body, and what he did to it. He then laid down and stared up at the ceiling. He could feel the blood rolling down his arm from his cut wrist. The throbbing of his fist was still there. All of this physical pain was nothing compared to the mental pain.

Binky laid there for several hours and thought about how his life had completely fallen apart over the past couple of years. It was an insidious experience, one that slowly drained the life away. He felt the hard steel knife in his hand. He could easily slice through his own throat and that would be it. No more suffering. The thought was enticing. He never told anybody about his gravitation to suicide, because no one would understand. At least death would end all misery.


	2. Chapter 2: An Unexpected Turn

Chapter 2

Binky woke up to his phone going off in his pocket. He sat up and yawned. He must have fallen asleep for a few hours. It was till light outside, but the sun was setting soon. The cut on his wrist had stopped bleeding but had yet to scab over. To Binky's annoyance, his phone kept ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at the screen: Sue Ellen. He didn't want to talk to anybody at the moment, especially her. She probably wanted to talk about why he punched his locker at school today. After a few more moments, the phone became silent. Thank goodness, she will probably be gone now.

A few minutes later, the phone went off again. Binky couldn't believe it. What did Sue Ellen want? He thought about it for a moment. Maybe it was just a school-related question that could be answered quickly. Well wait, why didn't she just text him the question then? Binky wasn't sure what to make of Sue Ellen calling him twice. Part of him wondered if Sue Ellen was in some kind of trouble and needed help. If that was the case, then he could help her and she would leave him alone. Yeah, that might be it. Binky sighed and answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Binky? It's Sue Ellen."

"Hey."

"Can I come over? I want to talk to you about something."

Now Binky was suspicious. What on earth did Sue Ellen want to discuss? They were never close friends. Mind you, they were never enemies, but it's not like they hung out all the time. Binky knew she wasn't attracted to him, that much was made clear back in freshman year when Sue Ellen admitted she had the hots for Brain. He didn't answer Sue Ellen's question for a few passing moments as he tried to figure out what she was thinking.

"Binky? You there?"

"Yeah."

"Can I come over? I don't mean to intrude."

"Sure, come whenever."

"Great, thanks. I'll be over in 10."

Binky hung up the phone and realized what he just did. He just gave permission to Sue Ellen to come over and "talk about something". He figured he just made a big mistake. It had been months since a friend came over to his house. Binky thought of his house as his sanctuary, where no one could bother him, except his idiotic mother. Now, someone else would violate the privacy of his home. Still, he was slightly curious as to what Sue Ellen wanted to converse about. If anything goes in the wrong direction, he could always just change the subject like he normally would do at school. Yes, that would work.

Binky looked down at his cut wrist and saw all the dried blood. He knew he had to wash off the blood and cover up the cut so Sue Ellen couldn't see it. He always wore long sleeves to cover up the other scars on his wrist, and so far no one noticed. The only problem was he never swam anymore, because he wanted no one to see his wrist scars.

He walked into the bathroom and place his wrist under a stream of warm water. It took over a minute of scrubbing with his thumb, but eventually the dried blood on his arm was gone.

"Binky, I made dinner," called Mrs. Barnes from the kitchen. Binky was surprised she was willing to talk to him after that last fight, but then again, they got into fights almost every day now.

"Not hungry," Binky called back. He dried off his arm and looked at himself in the mirror. Nope, he needed to see more. He took off his shirt and stared at his torso. He had lost a significant amount of weight over the past few years. He was now the skinniest guy out of his group of friends. Binky knew his deliberate starvation could be costly, but he didn't care. He rarely felt like eating, so he just didn't eat much. It was that straight forward. Some people just thought he outgrew his chubbiness. Nope, he just eat a few times a week. Sure, he was pretty tall, but he weighed less than Arthur, who was at least five inches shorter than him.

He put his shirt back on and walked back into his room to wait for Sue Ellen to arrive. A few minutes later, he heard a knock at the front door. Great, here we go. Hopefully this "conversation" will be short and sweet and she can get out of the house. Mrs. Barnes opened the door and greeted the visitor, then pointed her towards Binky's room. Binky looked down at his wrist. Okay, everything was covered.

Sue Ellen walked up to the doorway. "Hey Binky! Can I come in?"

"Yeah," replied Binky reluctantly. He desperately hoped she would sit in his bean bag in the corner of the room, as far away from him as possible. To his dislike, she plopped down on the bed next to him. This made Binky extremely uncomfortable. Was she going to try and seduce him to get him to talk about his feelings? Sue Ellen turned to Binky.

"So, what have you been up to? I feel like we haven't talked in a long time."

Binky didn't know how to respond. What was he supposed to say? That he's been up to cutting himself and starving himself to the point of anorexia? Besides, since when has Sue Ellen cared about him? It's not like they were ever close friends. Binky shifted his weight away from Sue Ellen as a precaution. She was trying to get him to spill out his secrets. He wasn't going to let that happen.

"Uh, just school and stuff," Binky finally said.

Sue Ellen didn't appear to want anything deeper than that. "Yeah, same here. This year is even tougher than last year, ya know?" she replied casually.

Binky felt relieved. Maybe she just wanted to shoot the shit with a friend. "Totally," muttered Binky. He honestly just wanted her to leave, but she hadn't said or done anything dangerous, at least not yet.

All of a sudden, Sue Ellen stood up and face Binky. "Binky, I want to show you something," she said in a serious tone.

"I thought you wanted to talk about something," asserted Binky, who was confused as to what Sue Ellen was up to. If she wanted him to leave the house to go somewhere, he would refuse.

"Well, I want to show you something, then talk about it," said Sue Ellen sincerely. Binky had no clue what she would show him, but he hoped it would be quick so she could leave him alone.

"Alright, what is it?" asked Binky reluctantly. He was waiting for Sue Ellen to pull of her mask and be a mass murdering alien underneath the façade. As it turned out, that couldn't be further from the truth.

Sue Ellen lifted her skirt up to her waist, and pointed to her right leg. Binky was taken aback that Sue Ellen would flash him like this. Did she like him? Did she want to fool around with him? He then saw what she was pointed at. The sight made him extremely triggered. He stared in disbelief: from Sue Ellen's mid-inner thigh up past her underwear, was dozens of scars, each over two inches long. That part of her leg looked horrific, because the scars made her skin bumpy and discolored. It honestly looked disgusting. Those scars were bigger than his. Maybe she was insane.

Sue Ellen lowered her skirt and looked at Binky with an intense face. "I know you self-harm, Binky. I wanted you to see my scars so you know you're not alone."

Binky felt his face turn red. "I don't self-harm!" he protested. He stood up and looked down at the petite girl. How arrogant of her? She assumed he self-harmed without any proof? Who did she think she was? Some kind of golden child who was never wrong?

Sue Ellen hugged Binky. "I've noticed your wrist for a while now. It's okay, Binky. I just want to help." Binky pulled his friend off of his slender frame. "You can help me by leaving right now," he growled.

Sue Ellen looked like she was going to cry. "I know it's been hard for you with your dad and all, but trust me Binky, cutting is not the way to handle it," she said softly.

Binky walked to the doorway and pointed towards the front door of the house. "Get out, Sue Ellen," he said sternly. He wasn't going to discuss this with her. Not in a million years. She was out of her mind.

Sue Ellen's eyes were watery. She looked down at her feet as she shuffled out of Binky's room. "I'm here for you, Binky," she said over her shoulder. Binky slammed the door shut without saying anything. He then pressed his ear up to the door. He heard Sue Ellen leave the house, which gave him a sense of relief. Was she psychotic? She had dozens of nasty scars on her leg…but even worse, she wanted to discuss his scars. That was not going to happen, especially since they weren't even close friends. Then she tried to tell him cutting wasn't the best way to cope. Cope with what? He was fine! Nothing was wrong, except that he sucked at school. She was making a big deal out of nothing. Stupid girl.

Binky waited for his mom to knock on his door and ask what happened with Sue Ellen. The knocks never came. Binky knew why: his mom had taken her antidepressants with liquor again, and that always knocked her out cold. If anything, she was passed out on the couch in the living room with a bottle of pills and a bottle of booze in her hands. Good, that meant peace and quiet for the time being. He somewhat hoped his mom would OD one day with her medication habits, but he also suspected it would not happen. His mom was disturbed, but not to the point of being suicidal. Binky then laid in his bed and stared up at the ceiling and thought about what Sue Ellen did. Hopefully that would be the last of such "scar talks".


	3. Chapter 3: Joining the Herd

Chapter 3

Binky tried his best to remain focused in class. He took notes on the lecture, but found them to be rather incomplete. Not to mention, his handwriting was sub-par, making it difficult to reread the notes later on for studying. As the teacher rambled on about the Renaissance and de Vinci, Binky began to lose focus. His eyes started to wander around the classroom. He knew about half the kids in there, including long-time friends Francine and Fern. Both of them were diligently taking notes as the teacher surged on through the lecture. Binky really didn't feel like taking any more notes, so he put his pen down and pulled out his phone. Phones weren't allowed in the classroom, but he didn't care. He spend the rest of class checking out online sports articles.

The bell went off in the hall, signaling time for lunch. Binky groaned. He hated lunch time, because that's when all his friends expected him to sit and eat with them. They realized Binky didn't eat much, but no one ever said anything. He would rather go sit outside and smoke a cigarette, which would give him some peace and quiet. Binky got up from his desk and headed out of the classroom. He decided that he would skip the lunch routine all together, and go for a walk outside of the building.

It was not as nice outside as it was yesterday. An overcast was in the sky, making everything dimmer and grayer. Still, the birds were chirping, being that it was spring time. Binky began to walk down the sidewalk and thought about how he would get through the rest of the school day. He had a few more classes to go, but he'd manage. Even if he had to resort to taking extra-long "bathroom breaks" he would do it. Anything to get out of the classroom and away from the stresses of academics.

On several occasions the principal had called Binky in his office to discuss his poor academic performance. Depending on the principal's mood, it either turned into a threat of flunking high school or getting help from a tutor. Either way, Binky's mom would get involved and get annoyingly upset over the matter. Most of the time, Binky and his mom would argue about what to do. In all cases, nothing effective was resolved. That was typical, because nothing could fix his problems, or so he thought.

As he turned to head onto another street, Binky saw a parked car. He walked up to it, because he knew that car. It was Molly's. Molly rolled down the window. Rattles and Slink were in the car with her. They all had beers in their hands.

"Binky! Haven't seen you in a while! Wanna join us? We got more," asked Molly as she handed a beer to Binky. Binky took the brown bottle and looked at it. Maybe having a cold one would take some of the edge off from school.

"Sure, I guess one wouldn't hurt," said Binky as he climbed into the back. Slink and Rattles were smoking cigarettes, while Molly was busy checking out her various piercings on her face.

"Bink, we gotta hang sometime, it's been too long," commented Rattles.

"Yeah, where the hell you been lately?" asked Slink.

Binky opened the bottle and took a drink. He knew his friends would try and get him to hang out. They were always nice to him, but since his dad left things were different.

"I've been around, just minding my own business, I guess," replied Binky sheepishly. Slink and Rattles looked at each other, then at Binky. Rattles chuckled. "Dude, you've fallen off the face of the earth! We gotta party it up or something this weekend!" Slink tapped his cigarette out the window. "You should totally come with us. We miss having you in the gang."

Binky gave a weak smile to his two earnest friends. Party? It didn't sound like a bad idea, especially if that meant getting wasted to the point of unconsciousness. Besides, it might get him out of the house and away from his mom. Binky probably trusted these guys more than anybody, even Arthur or Buster. Rattles, Slink, and Molly had remained loyal to him ever since he was held back a grade in elementary school. That much could be appreciated.

"Sure, I'm down," agreed Binky. He took a long drink from the bottle. Slink fist-bumped Binky's shoulder. "Hell yeah, man! It's gonna be like the good ol' times!" Rattles turned up the metal music playing on the radio. "We are going to tear it up, baby!"

Molly put her makeup mirror down. "Will you guys keep it down? I don't wanna get caught drinking at lunch break. Remember what Mr. Hanson told us last time?"

Rattles adjusted his backwards ball cap on his head. "Oh yeah, Bink, Mr. Hanson drilled us when we got caught having alcohol on school property last month. He said if we got caught again, he'd expel us and we wouldn't graduate."

"Yeah, screw Hanson. That guy needs to get laid and chill the hell out," added Slink.

Mr. Hanson was the high school principal. Binky knew how militant he was because of the one-on-one meetings about Binky's poor grades. Hanson spent over a decade in the Marines, and he still looked like a Marine, with the buzz cut, muscular frame, and a crazy look in his eyes. To be honest, Binky was a little afraid of him. There were rumors going around the high school that Mr. Hanson had chewed out some students for skipping class. One of the students apparently started crying and Mr. Hanson just mocked him for being "weak" or something like that. Secretly, Binky was relieved that he wasn't the only one who was weary of the hardcore disciplinary Hanson.

"You know what? I just had a great idea!" exclaimed Rattles. He set his beer in the cup-holder at his side. "We could skip the rest of the day, just to piss Hanson off!"

Slink high-fived Rattles, and let out a cheer. "That's awesome, let's do it!"

Molly turned off the radio, making the car much quieter. "No, guys," she asserted.

"C'mon, Molly, we're seniors, who gives a shit?" chuckled Rattles. Molly turned to Binky and Slink. "Don't listen to Rattles. He's an idiot."

"I am not! I'm just saying we could get away with it," suggested Rattles as he took a drink. Slink looked at Molly, then at Rattles. "What the heck? I'm in," he said triumphantly. Molly shook her head in disgust. "You guys can do whatever you want. I'm heading back to school once lunch is over."

Rattles and Slink turned to Binky. "Yo Bink, you in? It could be fun," chimed Slink with a smile. Binky thought about the proposition for a minute. When he was in class, he got terrible grades. So if he skipped class, he would still get terrible grades. It didn't make a difference whether he was there or not, at least not for one day. Besides, if he was out of school, then he could avoid an unwanted confrontation with Sue Ellen. That girl had some serious issues. The memory of her leg scars was still haunting Binky's mind. Yes, leaving school for the afternoon had too many pro's to ignore.

"I'm in," Binky finally said. "Alright, dude!" cheered Rattles. The three boys began to discuss their plans for the rest of the afternoon away from school, while Molly quietly played on her phone. Binky thought Molly was probably doing the smart thing, but he also knew that his grades were beyond saving. Even someone with a good conscience like Molly couldn't prevent Binky from avoiding school at all costs.


	4. Chapter 4: Fun Under a Bridge

Chapter 4

Molly dropped the three boys off in the school parking lot next to Rattle's car. She had a concerned look on her face. "You guys sure you wanna skip out?" she asked. Rattles and Slink began laughing. "C'mon, Molly, just be a good girl and go back to class," heckled Rattles. Molly shook her head and went to go find a parking spot. Rattles turned to Slink and Binky.

"Alrighty, men, let's go tear some shit up!" he said excitedly. They hopped into Rattle's car and drove off. "Yo, where we going first?" asked Slink. Rattles began to grin. "We're gonna stop by my place and grab some alcohol. My parents are both working so we don't have to worry about them," he replied.

Binky quietly sat in the backseat. He wasn't feeling the hype his two buddies were feeling, but he knew that anywhere was better than being stuck in class. He pulled up his sleeve and looked at his wrist. The cut from last night was beginning to scab over. Thank goodness. A bandage wouldn't be necessary.

The sight of his scars instantly reminded him of Sue Ellen's scars. Binky tried not to think about what Sue Ellen showed him, but he couldn't help it. Sue Ellen was the last person he's consider that self-harmed. She was so outgoing, confident, and popular. All the guys wanted to date her, and all the girls liked hanging out with her. Why'd she cut? It just seemed out of character for her. As Rattles turned on some punk rock, Binky tried to focus on that to clear his head. Forget Sue Ellen. She's crazy. She's not worth thinking about anyways.

The guys pulled up to Rattles' house after a few minutes. "I'll just be a minute," Rattles said as he hopped out of the car. Slink and Binky sat there in silence, listening to the music. Binky looked at the radio clock. By now, afternoon classes had started. He imagined his history teacher taking attendance and wondering why Binky hadn't showed up. The thought made Binky grin. Screw history class. Heck, screw class in general. All of his teachers made him feel so stupid all the time, so they didn't need his presence. It was that simple.

Rattles ran back to the car with a small cardboard box. "What did you get?" asked Slink with a laugh. Rattles opened the backseat door and placed the box on the seat. "Dude, I got several bottles of whiskey and some beers," replied Rattles. Binky glanced at the contents in the box. Rattles expected they would drink all of this? It was enough alcohol for a dozen people. Oh well, time to get wasted on a school day.

"Off to the eastside bridge!" called Rattles rather obnoxiously. He and Slink fist-bumped each other, and off they went to their drinking destination. It took about fifteen minutes, but eventually the guys arrived at the scene. They got out and looked around. The eastside bridge was not near any neighborhoods, which was good, because that meant no one could catch some teens drinking alcohol. The only people around here were the blue collar workers who worked in the nearby factories and homeless people. The boys assumed neither of those groups would care if some teenagers were partying underneath the bridge.

They set up camp under the bridge, meaning just placing a picnic blanket on the hard concrete. Rattles opened up a bottle and took several big gulps. "Whoo! That's what I'm talking about!" he said loudly. He passed the bottle to Slink, who also took several big gulps. Slink passed the bottle to Binky. Binky felt the hard glass bottle in his hands. The whiskey was a dark amber color, and he could smell the strong scent of alcohol oozing from the mouth of the bottle. "C'mon, Bink, take a swig!" encouraged Slink. Binky shrugged his shoulders, then drank a big mouthful of the liquid. The burning sensation made him cough. Rattles and Slink started laughing.

"Man, Bink, we gotta build up your tolerance!" joked Rattles, as Binky handed him the bottle. For the next hour, the three teens took turns drinking the whiskey. They played music on Rattles phone and talked about everything from girls to skateboarding. They could hear when cars drove above their heads on the bridge. By hour two, the three teens were far more relaxed and loud.

"So then, I see this chick, and I mean, she had the best rack I've ever seen. I walked up to her and tried hitting on her," explained Rattles. Slink was swaying back and forth as he sat on the blanket. "She had a boyfriend right?" he asked with a big, toothy grin. Rattles took another drink. "Yeah. Stupid bitch," he chuckled. Slink busted out laughing. "I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!" he yelled. "Yo, shut the hell up, man," whispered Rattles. Slink winked at him. "Aye, captain!" he responded sarcastically.

Binky wasn't sure how much more alcohol he could handle. After losing so much weight over the past year or two, his tolerance was nowhere near what it used to be. He felt extremely dizzy, yet he felt great too. He didn't feel the anxiety that he normally felt. Right now, he felt like nothing in the world mattered. Nothing could bother him. That was a great feeling, much better than being stuck in class all afternoon.

Rattles cracked open a beer. "Bink, got any poon lately?" he asked with a laugh. Binky shook his head but didn't say anything. Rattles and Slink, who were by this point a little too drunk, took this as a sign that Binky was hiding something.

"C'mon, dude, who's the lucky girl?" said Slink as he slapped Binky's back. Binky looked at the ground. Did these idiots really want to talk about him? Since when did they ever give a crap what was going on his life? It was like Sue Ellen all over again – people asking just to ask, not because they cared.

"No one. I've been single," replied Binky, trying to sound as casual as possible. Slink turned to Rattles. "He's lying to us, man," he said to his intoxicated buddy. Rattles began to chuckle. "Oh, Bink," Rattles began, "We both know you are slaying all those freshmen girls!" Slink started laughing so hard he was holding his belly. Binky didn't say anything. Maybe he should just head home now? If they wanted to talk about him, then he wasn't interested.

"Nah, just been me, that's all," Binky said quietly. Rattles and Slink looked like they were surprised by Binky's lack of humor. "Dude, we're just messing with ya," commented Slink. "Yeah, we're just dickin' around," chimed in Rattles. The two friends looked at Binky, who was staring at the ground. Binky felt their eyes piercing him, but he didn't care. If he just stayed quiet about himself, then they would stop talking about him. Rattles then leaned over and put his hand in the box of goodies.

"I got some cigarettes in here too, boys!" he heckled with excitement. He passed around the smokes and a lighter. Binky felt relieved. Okay, so they were done talking about him. Now they can all just smoke, drink, and have a good time talking about other stuff. Slink laid down on the blanket. "Oh shit, man, I need to chill out for a minute," he said dramatically. Rattles took a drink of his beer. "Haha, what a whimp!" he said as he threw a small rock at Slink. Slink just flipped him off. "Yo, not cool, man, I'm trying to take a nap," exclaimed Slink. Rattles then leaned up against the concrete wall and closed his eyes. Binky watched his two friends as they drifted off to sleep.

After a few minutes, both Rattles and Slink were snoring rather obnoxiously. Binky took this as his chance. He stood up, which instantly made him felt lightheaded, then started heading up to the road. He was done socializing for a day. He just wanted to be alone now. He walked for a few minutes, until he reached a bus stop. He waited there and wondered if his mom would notice the stench of alcohol on his breath when he got home.


	5. Chapter 5: A Haunting Taste of Power

Chapter 5

Binky stepped into his house and looked at his watch. It was a few hours after school had gotten out. Another day, another survival. He started heading for his room when he heard the voice he dreaded to hear all afternoon.

"Binky Barnes! Where the hell have you been?!"

Mrs. Barnes stormed out of the kitchen and glared at her son. Binky avoided eye contact. He didn't owe his mother an explanation. She should just keep to her own business.

"Mr. Hanson called me and said you weren't in class this afternoon! And you never put in a sick note!" exclaimed Mrs. Barnes with a red face. She strutted up to Binky and smacked him across the face. "You are already going to fail this semester, don't make it worse, you idiot!" she yelled.

Binky put his hand up to the side of his face and felt the burning sensation of the slap. He stared at his mother with anger in his eyes. Who was she to condemn him? He is almost an adult, and capable of making his own decisions! Binky decided she was not worth the fight, even though she was asking for trouble when she hit him.

"Don't worry about it," he muttered, then started heading to his room.

"Not so fast!" growled Mrs. Barnes as she grabbed Binky's shoulder to stop him. Binky instinctively turned around and struck his mother with full force. Mrs. Barnes tumbled over and placed both hands over her eye, where the fist made contact. She scurried back with fear in her eyes. Her nose was also bleeding, but she was occupied with the shock of being hit by her own son.

"I don't want to hear all this shit about school, got it?" spat Binky. He took a powerful step forward. Mrs. Barnes cowered back from the intimidation. Binky smirked. He never thought he could hit his mother, but now that he did it, it felt great. He felt better than when he was hammered a couple of hours ago.

Mrs. Barnes' eyes were wide with immense fear. Her mouth was slightly open, and her face was stricken with disbelief. "Binky…" she began to say, but Binky held up his fist and waved it at her.

"No! No! Don't try and sweet talk me. Next time I'll hit harder, so you better keep your freaking mouth shut!" said Binky furiously. He felt so alive right now. Seeing his mother cower in fear like a little child…it was the perfect scenario. Now he was in charge. Now he had the power to make things his way in the house.

Binky then turned around and marched off to his room. He slammed the door as an exclamation point on his victory over his mother. He sat on the bed and took a deep breath. Hopefully, that punch settled the tension that had been wreaking havoc in the household since his dad left. Binky looked down at the cuts on his wrists. Maybe another cut would calm him down from all the excitement.

"Binky, I know you cut."

Binky shot his head up and saw Sue Ellen standing there. She had a serious look on her face, just like the night before.

"Sue Ellen? What are you doing in here? Get the hell out!" cried Binky.

Sue Ellen seemed oblivious to Binky's harsh words. "I wanted to let you know I cut too. We can get through this together," she said solemnly. Binky then watched in terror as Sue Ellen took off her shirt and jeans to reveal hundreds of scars all over her body. The scars were red, and some were still bleeding flesh blood. Binky screamed in fear as he saw how hideous her body looked from all the abuse with the razor.

"You're not alone, Binky," Sue Ellen whispered. Binky grabbed his pillow and threw it at Sue Ellen. CRASH! The pillow struck the shelf against the wall and knocked stuff onto the ground. Binky sat there for a moment and shook his head. He then realized he had been imagining the whole thing. He laid back on his bed and massaged the sides of his head. Who was he kidding? He couldn't forget what Sue Ellen showed or told him. It was like a memory that couldn't be let go.

Binky sighed. Should he reach back out to Sue Ellen? Maybe she had some advice for him? Binky then let out a sinister chuckle. No, that girl had nothing to offer him. He didn't need help because he had no problems, except school. Besides school, Binky had everything under control. No stupid girl could tell him otherwise.

Binky sat back up and looked at the mirror on his wall. He peered at the reflective image of himself. If Sue Ellen was just crazy and stupid, then why couldn't he just forget all about it? Binky groaned in frustration. Sooner or later, he knew Sue Ellen would approach him again about the cutting business. She had always been a persistent person, and she wouldn't let one bad conversation end the entire thing.

Binky then pulled out his knife, and began to inflict a deep cut into his wrist. As the blood and pain flooded his arm, he dwelled on the emptiness he truly felt inside.


	6. Chapter 6: Another Reminder of Failure

Chapter 6

Binky walked in through the school doors and did what he always did: he lowered his head and avoided eye contact at all costs. As he made his way towards his locker, he noticed Arthur, Buster, and Brain all laughing in a closed circle. The thought made Binky long for close friends, but he knew he was too screwed up for that luxury.

Arthur noticed Binky walking by and turned to him: "Hey Binky! We were just talking about John Johnson: Part III. Have you seen it? It's hilarious!"

Binky kept his gaze towards the ground as he kept walking. "Nah, I haven't," he replied, as if trying to avoid conversation.

Arthur's smile faded. "Oh…well…you should see it! See you around!" Arthur said awkwardly, though he tried to sound friendly. Binky didn't say anything. He just kept on moving forward. He appreciated Arthur's amiable attempt, but the reality was Arthur had no clue what he was facing every minute of every day. It was like trying to stop the monster of insanity from gulping him up.

Binky arrived at his locker and began to pull some notebooks out. As he was busy with restocking his backpack, he heard some dreaded words on the PA system: "Binky Barnes, please report to the principal's office, immediately."

Binky lightly slammed his head into his locker. "Great," he muttered to himself. He knew what Hanson would talk about: why he skipped yesterday afternoon classes, and also, who else participated with him. Binky had been chewed out by Hanson before on a multitude of occasions, but he was getting tired of all the principal's drama. He knew Hanson, like a stereotypical military man, would preach about integrity, discipline and strong character. Binky, to no surprise, had no interest in lectures about morality. He simply just wanted to avoid school since school had crapped on him since kindergarten.

Binky slammed his locker shut and trudged to the principal's office. As he neared the main office door, Ms. Tingley (who got promoted to high school secretary a few years ago) stuck her head out of the doorframe.

"Mr. Barnes! Step it up! Do not leave Mr. Hanson waiting," she barked. Binky rolled his eyes and didn't change his walking pace. If Hanson had to wait another ten seconds, so what? The man would survive.

Ms. Tingley led Binky into Hanson's office. Mr. Theodore Hanson, a tall and muscular man, sat like a dictator in his large leather chair. He had a look of anger on his face.

"Mr. Barnes, have a seat," commanded Mr. Hanson with a gesture of his hand.

Binky reluctantly sat down and tried to avoid looking at Hanson. He waited for Mr. Hanson to explode in rage, but Mr. Hanson remained still. Finally, the principal cleared his throat.

"So, Mr. Barnes, some of the teachers yesterday informed me that you were absent for afternoon classes," stated Mr. Hanson in his deep, powerful voice.

Binky figured he might as well just admit his crime then take the punishment and end the misery. "Yes, sir, I skipped yesterday afternoon," said Binky with an unusual amount of confidence and volume.

Mr. Hanson began to stroke his rather masculine chin. "Why did you skip, Mr. Barnes? We both know your grades are far below average."

Binky finally made eye contact with his principal. "Because I don't want to go to school anymore. I'm done with it," said Binky. He could feel his anger rising. Why did Hanson care what he did? If he were to flunk high school, that wasn't Hanson's problem. It was his own problem. But then again, Binky didn't see it as a problem to begin with.

Mr. Hanson pounded his big fists on the top of his desk. "Mr. Barnes, you are ungrateful for your education and it sickens me!" exclaimed Mr. Hanson loudly. Binky knew his anger was hitting flash point. At any time now, he wouldn't be able to control himself, and he might piss off Hanson even more.

"Mr. Hanson, I don't need your approval for anything!" growled Binky with intensity in his eyes. Mr. Hanson shot up from his chair and pointed a finger at Binky.

"I don't care what happened in your personal life, Mr. Barnes! That's no excuse to be a stupid, lazy, coward who begs to be a victim! You will suffer my wrath!" boomed Mr. Hanson. Ms. Tingley stuck her head in the door.

"Everything okay, sir?" she asked sheepishly.

"Fine, Ms. Tingley. Please shut the door," said Mr. Hanson. Ms. Tingley shut the door and Mr. Hanson marched over to Binky with authority.

"You are going to get expelled, Mr. Barnes! Until further notice!" said the principal sadistically. Binky stood up and stared straight into Hanson's eyes. Binky was actually the same height as Hanson, though Hanson was significantly larger in mass.

"Do whatever you want. Your hissy fit isn't going to change me!" spat Binky.

Mr. Hanson's eyes narrowed in anger. He walked over to the door and opened it. "Get the hell out of my office, Barnes. And don't come back to school until I say so! If I ever do!" ordered Mr. Hanson with a sinister grin on his face. Binky felt his fingers close into a fist, but he knew Hanson would beat the shit out of him if he tried to fight.

Binky strolled out of the office with his head held high. He didn't have to come to school now! He was free until that asshole Hanson said so! Binky went to his locker and began to empty out his backpack. He didn't need all that school stuff anymore…

"Hey Binky!"

Binky shot around and almost had the urge to run away: it was Sue Ellen. She was smiling and holding a big history book in her little arms.

"Uh, hey," said Binky quickly, and he turned back to continue emptying his backpack. He could sense Sue Ellen watching him. Why couldn't the girl just go away?

"So Binky, I was wondering if you wanna hang out after school today, you know, go to the Sugar Bowl or something," asked Sue Ellen with sincerity. Binky felt his stomach do a backflip and end up in his feet.

"Is this a…date?" he said suspiciously.

Sue Ellen laughed innocently. "No silly! I just like talking to you and I thought we could spend more time together!"

Binky narrowed his eyes in skepticism. No, she didn't want to "hang out", she wanted to talk about his cutting, and perhaps more. Stupid girl, she just didn't understand.

"I'm not so sure, ya know, I'm busy and stuff," responded Binky vaguely. Sue Ellen's smile didn't flinch. How could such a happy girl cut herself like a piece of meat?

"Alright, that's okay. And by the way, I'm sorry if I scared you the other night…you know, with my scars. I hope they didn't make you feel uncomfortable," said Sue Ellen.

Binky wanted to strangle Sue Ellen for making such a dumb statement. Of course they made him feel uncomfortable! She had so many of them! And they were big and hideous!

"Eh, it's okay, but I don't cut so I don't know why you showed me," replied Binky with a false air of superiority.

Sue Ellen shook her head. "Binky, we both know you cut. But I don't need you to confess to me, I just want you to feel better, that's all," said Sue Ellen compassionately.

Binky slung his backpack over his shoulder. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, Sue Ellen. I'll see you later," he said, then sped off before Sue Ellen could say another word to him.


	7. Chapter 7: Numbness Then Pain

Chapter 7

Binky opened the door to his house. His mom was at the hospital, where she worked. Being a nurse, Mrs. Barnes had several twelve hour shifts a week, meaning Binky often had the house to himself. Binky threw his backpack on the couch and sighed. He didn't have to go to school tomorrow, or the next day, or perhaps never. Mr. Hanson wouldn't dare let Binky back into the building.

"Screw, Hanson. What a prick," muttered Binky to himself as he walked into the kitchen. He already had plans for tonight. They didn't involve friends or family. Nope, the only thing he was going to do was get absolutely hammered and forget about all his troubles.

Binky opened the liquor cabinet and pulled out his mom's bottle of vodka. This would do. Binky popped it open and took a big swig. He instantly felt the burning sensation of fire run down his throat and into his gut. He coughed, then smiled for the first time that day. Alcohol…the best medicine there is.

Binky knew his mom wouldn't be home until about 9pm, because she left just after Binky went to school. That gave him all day to drink himself silly. He sat on the couch in the living room and turned on the TV. There was nothing on in the morning but soap operas and the local news. Both bored Binky to the point of annoyance. He flipped through the channels with frustration. Nothing on TV to watch! What a pain in the ass!

Binky took another big swig of the vodka and leaned his head back on the couch. Maybe just sitting and drinking would suffice? He sat there for a while and thought about how his life had turned south. What could he do? He was a victim of circumstance, plain and simple. None of this was his fault. It wasn't his fault Mr. Hanson was a jerk who took pleasure in disciplining students. It wasn't his fault his mom couldn't forget about his stupid dad. It wasn't his fault Sue Ellen kept bothering him. In fact, Binky wondered if any of his vices were truly his fault. Was cutting, drinking, pornography, or degenerate behavior that bad? Maybe he was crazy, which is why he indulges in all those things?

Another hour passed. By this point, the bottle of vodka was gone, and Binky was very intoxicated. He knew he had little control over his body. Then, he had an idea: he could cut again! A disturbing excitement rushed over him, and he stumbled to the kitchen. Although seeing doubles, Binky managed to grab the large kitchen knife from the drawer.

He took off his shirt and placed the steel blade against his abdomen. He looked down, and chuckled. Sure, he was drunk, but who cares? It was his body, he could abuse it all he wanted.

"I'm my own boss, world! Not you!" he yelled, then quickly pulled the knife's blade all the way across his gut. Blood poured from the large laceration.

"Ahhh! SHIT!" Binky groaned as he fell to his knees. His head was swirling from all the alcohol, but he could feel the immense pain from the knife. He looked down at his abdomen and saw the damage. The knife had opened several layers of skin. He could see the red material below: muscle. He had cut completely below the skin and into the layer of muscle below. Talk about a deep cut. Blood rushed out from the 6 inch cut and flooded the floor. Binky clenched his cut in agony.

"Arrghh! I went too deep, damn it!" he thought to himself. He sat on his knees for over a minute, while silently dealing with the pain. The vodka made it worse, because now he was nauseous from all the alcohol in his stomach. As the blood continued to pour onto the floor, Binky felt himself losing consciousness. Before he could do anything, he blacked out in a pool of his own blood.


	8. Chapter 8: A Knight in Shining Armor

Chapter 8

Binky slowly opened his eyes. As the light from his surroundings came flooding into sight, he squinted. He immediately felt a throbbing pain across his abdomen, where the laceration was located. His stomach also hurt from the bottle of booze he had downed a few…wait, how long has it been since he passed out?

Binky sat up and realized he was in a hospital room. He was wearing a patient's gown, and had several wires hooked up to his chest and arms. An IV was slowly dripping saline into his body from the side of the bed. He looked down at his mid-region. The cut had been bandaged up, so he couldn't see how bad it had turned out. He could also feel stitches through his cut, which made him feel better. At least he wouldn't be making a bloody mess.

The door to the hallway opened up, and a doctor walked into the room.

"Mr. Barnes, good to see you're up. How are you feeling?"

Binky winced at the pains coming from his gut. "I'm in some pain, but I'll be okay," he replied quietly. The doctor pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat down. He had a serious look on his face. "Mr. Barnes, would you like to tell me what happened at your house?"

Binky's face went sour. "What do you mean, doc?" He knew what the doctor was referring to, but wanted to be annoying just because he could.

The doctor kept his gaze steady on Binky. "Your mother found you unconscious in the kitchen, with a large cut across your abdomen and a kitchen knife in your hand. You were covered with blood. It really scared her, Mr. Barnes."

Binky crossed his arms in defiance. "I don't care if my mom was scared or not, she's a coward anyways."

"If you tried to kill yourself, then I would say you'd be the coward," replied the doctor coolly.

Binky felt his anger rising. Who was this doctor trying to impress? Doctors, they always thought they were so much smarter than anybody else. "It wasn't suicide, you know," stated Binky, "But I thought it would be a thrill rush."

The doctor, being much older than Binky, had seen his fair share of patients and their problems. Binky's psyche hadn't phased him one bit. "A thrill rush? You like feeling alive when that pain hits you right?"

Binky nodded, and felt relieved that the doctor wasn't as stupid as he initially thought. "Yeah, it's weird, but I don't care what people think. They can say whatever they want. It's my body and I can do anything I want to it."

The doctor leaned back in the chair and rested his chin on his hand, as if deeply pondering Binky's statement. "Well, you are committed to this "thrill rush". The nurses told me they noticed you have lots of scars on your wrist. Are you proud of those scars, Binky?"

Binky turned his head and began to stare outside at the nearby trees and bushes. "I'm not showing them off to anybody, if that answers your question," he replied.

"I see," said the doctor, then he stood up. "Mr. Barnes, I've asked for a hospital psychiatrist to come and talk to you. I think you should really consider."

Binky whipped his head around and glared at the doctor. A psychiatrist? Isn't that the doctor that deals with psychopaths and insane people? "Why? I don't need a psychiatrist!" Binky protested.

The doctor continued his Stoic expression. "Just see where it goes, Mr. Barnes. It never hurts to talk to an expert. Doctor Marietti is very experienced in dealing with situations like this."

"Screw Doc Marietti! I'm not talking to a shrink!" spat Binky with his clenched fists. The doctor began to head out of the room. "She'll be here in a few minutes, so just sit tight."

As the doctor shut the door behind him, Binky pounded his fists onto the bed. Stupid doctor, trying to make him out as a psycho or something. Binky could hear the heart monitor beating softly with each cycle of his heartbeat. The hospital room was also warm, which made him relaxed and sleepy. He laid back down and closed his eyes. Within a few moments, he fell asleep.

Binky woke up from the feeling of his arm being touched. He opened his eyes and found himself looking at the face of the angel. She had dark brown hair, and brown eyes. She had olive oil skin, and a round face. Binky couldn't help but admire her beauty. She was wearing a skirt (unfortunately for Binky, she had her legs crossed so he couldn't see any upskirt shot). Binky also noticed her fantastic bosom, which was slightly protruding out of her black blouse.

"Binky? My name is Doctor Marietti. I'm sure you were told I was coming," said the doctor with a smile on her face.

Binky felt his heart skip a beat. She was beautiful beyond compare, more beautiful than any of the girls at school. Binky felt the rise underneath his gown.

"Uh, yeah, I was told," Binky replied sheepishly.

Doctor Marietti continued to smile, which showed off her bright white, perfect teeth. "So Binky, how are you feeling? Do you feel relaxed?"

Binky let out a smile. "Yes, I do. I feel great, actually."

Doctor Marietti's eyes brightened. "Oh? And why's that?"

Binky almost blurted out that he was in the presence of a queen, but he stopped himself in embarrassment. "I don't know, must be the pain killers," he replied, then let out an obviously fake laugh. He instantly regretted that move, because he probably sounded like a complete moron. Doctor Marietti laughed a little to his surprise, which made him blush.

"Now Binky, I'm a psychiatrist, and I'm here to help you in any way I can," said the doctor.

Binky was insulting himself in his thoughts for blushing, but he tried to hide his self-annoyance. "Okay…so what do you think so far?" he asked.

"I think you're a very nice boy who just needs some guidance," stated Doctor Marietti. Binky felt his face go warm again from being called a "very nice boy", but then he realized she said "boy" and not "man". Sigh…she was older than him by at least 10 years.

"Do you think I'm crazy?" inquired Binky.

Doctor Marietti shook her head. "No, Binky, not at all. I've seen all kinds of people who cut themselves: lawyers, teachers, police officers, and pretty much anybody else you can think of. Please don't think you're crazy, because I don't think that's true one bit."

Binky was surprised she brought up cutting that fast, but then again, that's why she was here in the first place. "Yeah, I guess that's true," he said quietly.

Doctor Marietti leaned in towards Binky. "I used to cut, Binky. When I was a teenager. I understand what you're going through, and you're not alone okay?"

If literally anybody else said this to him, he would have gotten pissed off, but not with Doctor Marietti. She was different. She seemed so perfect, that anything she said could be taken as the golden truth. "Thanks. I feel lonely all the time," replied Binky.

"I'm sure you do. And I'm going to make sure we get you on the right path, alright? Loneliness is nature, but we have to be careful with it. So tell me when you started cutting and why."

And with that, Binky spent the next hour talking with Doctor Marietti about his thoughts and feelings, and why he resorted to cutting. He honestly felt at peace being around her, because she had a light to her. It was though she was glowing with happiness and kindness. Not to mention, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.


	9. Chapter 9: A Turn of the Tide

Chapter 9

Binky and Doctor Marietti talked for quite some time. While Binky did most of the talking, the psychiatrist also added to the conversation. Binky was still mesmerized by the doctor's beauty and elegance. Everything about her was perfect. There was nothing wrong about her.

"So Binky, I think I have a much better context about you now," said Doctor Marietti.

Binky nodded. "Yeah, that's pretty much my story, doc. It's not that interesting, but it's the truth."

Doctor Marietti's eyes widened and she leaned forward in her chair. "Oh no, Binky, I think it is very interesting. It's also very painful to hear for the first time."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because anyone that intentionally hurts themselves is obviously in a lot of psychological pain. People need to get pushed pretty far to hurt themselves on purpose," explained Doctor Marietti softly.

Binky carefully considered what the doctor had proposed. Was he in deep mental suffering? In some ways, the notion made sense, but he also didn't feel uncomfortable with the pain. Maybe because he has been suffering for so long…

"Doctor Marietti? You're not gonna send me to a freak hospital are you?" asked Binky. He had been thinking about the question for the past half hour, but finally mustered up the courage to say something.

The doctor carefully eyed Binky, as if evaluating him with immense skill. "They're called psychiatric hospitals, Binky. Well, your little act with the kitchen knife wasn't technically a suicide attempt…but nonetheless, I think you do need to go to a psych hospital."

Binky felt his stomach roll down into his ankles. A burst of anger swelled up deep inside of him. Doctor Marietti had betrayed him! She was going to ship him off to a crazy place full of wackos and maniacs! And Binky thought they were becoming fast friends…

"No! I don't need to be hospitalized!" protested Binky indignantly.

Doctor Marietti's face went solemn, mixed with some sadness. She looked like she was genuinely concerned with Binky. "Binky…I think if you were to stay at my hospital for a week or two, it would help you get your mental strength back. Don't worry, we will just give you some medication to try, you'll go to therapy sessions, and you can just relax. It's a very calming environment and it promotes healing."

Binky felt betrayed. Marietti had planned this from the start…she was going to lure him in with her attractive physique and style, then snatch him up like a fly in a spiderweb. He wasn't going to let that bitch take him so easily.

"No! I'm not going to some mental hospital! I'm fine!" said Binky defiantly.

Doctor Marietti maintained her composure. "Binky, please trust me. This will be good for you, and it's only for a short while."

"I said NO, you bitch!" snapped Binky with fire in his eyes. Doctor Marietti leaned back and slightly gasped in disbelief.

"Binky, why are you so angry with me? I'm trying to help you," she said, this time in a more firm tone.

"I'm angry because you're treating me like I'm some sort of freak. Lock up the freak, he's too dangerous to be out in the real world! Oh please, Doc, that's all bullshit and you know it."

Doctor Marietti stood up slowly and smoothed out the wrinkles in her skirt. "Binky, I honestly think you need to be hospitalized. So that is my decision. I'm sorry you're opposed, but this is the best option."

Binky slammed his fists into the bed. "You can't make me go! I'm a free man!" he growled.

"Actually, legally, I can force you to go. You are a danger to yourself, and with your current aggression, I would say you're a danger to other people as well," stated Doctor Marietti coldly. Binky was taken aback. She sounded so apathetic, like she could care less about his feelings. She truly was manipulating him.

"Screw you, get out of my room!" yelled Binky. He threw a pillow at Marietti, who swatted it down with her hand. Doctor Marietti walked out of the room without saying goodbye, which made Binky sad. He was mostly sad and upset that Marietti had conned him. She put up this façade of beauty and compassion, but that turned into a cruel and sadistic monster.


	10. Chapter 10: Force to Freedom

Chapter 10

Binky heard Doctor Marietti's voice out in the hallway. Some other voices, including his mother's and nurse's, could also be heard. Binky began to feel his heart beating faster than it had already been. He knew Marietti was telling them that he was a monster that needed to be shunned from society. As he directed his ear towards the door to pick up any words, he had an idea. Binky knew he was big: 6'4" and 260 lbs. He could easily overpower anybody that tried to stop him if he left the hospital.

He debated the notion of escape for what seemed like half a second. Was it worth abandoning Marietti? Was she really manipulative or actually trying to help him? Whatever the answer was, it didn't matter. He knew Marietti would never fall for a high schooler like him anyways. It was now or never – be free from a psycho ward and Marietti's malicious plan, or be in bondage for years to come…

Binky hopped out of the bed and quickly dressed himself. "Thank goodness they left my clothes here," Binky muttered to himself, though he tried to remain quiet. He assumed he had to do a sneak attack in order to maximize his chances of getting free.

As he slipped on his second shoe, he tip-toed across the wall near the entrance to the room. He peeked out of the corner of the door frame, and saw Marietti talking with his mother, his nurse, and his doctor. The three were nodding as Marietti spoke. "Jesus, that bitch has the whole crew down on this plan," Binky thought in frustration.

He leaned up against the wall and held his hand to his chest. His heart was pounding. He could feel the drops of sweat roll down his face. Adrenaline was surging throughout his body. He almost felt lightheaded he was so nervous. What if security tackles him? What if a nurse sticks him with a potent sedative? He'd wake up chained to a bed in a psych ward!

"Sigh…fuck it, I'm not gonna let them win," he insisted, then stormed out the door in a fast face.

Mrs. Barnes was the first to notice Binky, and her face went instantly white.

"Binky?! Why do you have your street clothes back on?!" asked Mrs. Barnes in a high voice. The nurse, doctor, and Marietti whipped around to see Binky fly past them in a speed walk. He knew if he ran, that would only make matters worse. But since he was so tall, his strides could still move him quickly.

"Binky! Come back here!" Ordered the doctor, but instantly realized that his command was futile. The four adults ran up to Binky then stepped in front of him. Binky didn't stop. He placed his two large hands on the petite nurse, picked her up, and literally moved her out of the way. The nurse screamed in fear that she was about to be pulverized. Binky ignored the commotion, and kept chugging forward.

Mrs. Barnes grabbed Binky's hand and pulled backwards.

"Binky! Please stop! You don't have to walk out like this!" she said.

Binky began pulling his mother across the tile floor of the hospital.

The doctor then grabbed Binky's other hand and pulled backwards too.

"Binky! Trust me, you need help! It's okay to need help! We all need it!" begged the doctor.

Binky yanked his gorilla arms forward out of the hands of his adversaries. He then whipped his head with a look of malice on his face.

"Help? I don't need your help! And how arrogant of you to think that you know what I need! Go to hell, Doctor Doolittle!" Spat Binky. He then stormed down the main hallway, as people stepped out of his way.

He saw security turn a corner in front of him and charge right at him. Two average size guys, but they didn't have any guns, only batons.

"Last obstacle…" thought Binky with a grin. He then lowered his shoulder, and sprinted towards the two security officers. Binky had been a starter on the varsity football team before he was kicked off because of grades. He knew how to run people over – it was a Binky specialty in his mind.

The two security officers pulled out their batons and yelled for Binky to stop or else they would use force.

Binky covered his face with his hands and felt his massive shoulders collide with the two guards. BAM! Binky's speed and size was too much for the average built men. He easily bulldozed them over. Binky heard one or two loud cracks, but he knew he didn't break anything. In fact, he felt amazing – so alive, better than he had felt in a long time.

With the two security officers out of the way, Binky then ran out of the main exit doors and out into the parking lot. Without even thinking, he whipped out his cell phone and called Rattles.

"Rattles, meet me on the corner of 3rd and Potter, NOW!"

"Yo, Bink, the hell you talkin' about man?"

"I don't have time to explain, just do it! I'll be there in 5, okay? Okay."

Binky hung up his phone and began to half run-half jog to the meeting site, all while hoping that Rattles would get off his fat ass and actually pick him up.


End file.
